Monday, February 2, 2015

Oh The Shade!

As a person who loves to read and discussing books I thoroughly enjoy author groups and fan pages. It gives readers and bloggers the chance to interact with authors, and other readers amongst other things like contests and snippets. My issue with these mediums is that sometimes authors, admins and other readers use such platforms to bully and alienate others. It’s really sad and disheartening when you join a group and participate in discussion to get called out by admins because of difference of opinions. We are adults here although that doesn’t equate to maturity but, nonetheless, we are adults so why not agree to disagree?

I always mention that publishing books is a business for authors. In conjunction with publishing you must promote and market yourself. That means using social media to your advantage. Unfortunately most are about making friends and don’t want to rock the boat and stand for anything. For instance, when a group discussion occurs its understandable emotions run high and things can get taken out of context but it’s not ever okay to call out other readers and verbally attack them because they don’t agree with you. What’s worst is that when authors are notified about this they do nothing and stand by their admins or whomever. But the point is it will never be acceptable to sit back and allow someone to attack another. Understand that this hurts your brand and alienates readers who in turn pay you.

Maybe I should refresh people on what cyberbullying means. According to Webster dictionary Cyberbullying (noun) is defined as the use of electronic communication to bully a person, typically by sending messages of an intimidating or threatening nature.

This definition is extended to memes as well. I think its comical how bullies talk in memes so since this is a language they understand here are a few memes for ya’!

I thought the purpose of these groups/pages was for readers to come together and discuss all things books. Unfortunately it is anything but. Most have become a cesspool of negativity and the discussions are rarely about books. Sadly I have witnessed this activity go one for way too long and it honestly turns me off from the authors since it is their group. So to all the bullies and others who condone this behavior here is a meme for you.
This is not the gospel but just one persons opinion about what I have seen and experienced in these groups. I would love to hear what other readers and authors hopefully have to say about this issue. I hope bullies take heed and authors realize that this behavior will not help you only hurt you. Please find yourselves......


  1. I couldn't have said this better myself. While I have never considered myself "cyberbullied", I have been on the receiving end of some hateration by some very childish women all because of a difference of opinion. I am very vocal with my thoughts, and I'm not about that let's not rock the boat life because I'm afraid of pissing somebody off. I have much more respect for people who speak their truth even when I don't agree than someone who would say nothing or ignore the issue altogether. And these memes are hilarious. Some of us can't seem to offer a rebuttal or an intelligent counter-response without using them now.

    1. I agree. It's just sad that you can't be vocal about a difference of opinion without someone feeling as though they must have a disrespectful comment to follow. I'm all for healthy discussion but these "ladies" take it to the point.

  2. Two words: Diplomacy matters.

    I've been an admin for two IR authors and although I know not everyone is a Natalie fan, those authors trusted me to help run their group. I respect varying opinions and I would never snatch wigs in a forum where engagement is encouraged. There's a way that you draw the line and nip things in the bud if a discussion gets heated or if intentions are misunderstood. You deal with it privately, always.

    I'm not a fan of passive aggressive behavior. Authors have to keep their admins in check but at the same time, not alienate fans. It's all about finding a balance because ultimately, you can't excuse bad behavior. Just my 2 pennies worth. Reading this post hurt my heart. We already got enough problems in the genre! :(

    1. Thank you so much Natalie for your honesty. I appreciate it. And I totally agree with you. I couldn't have said it better. It's sad and it's just another issue for this genre.